to take advantage of this INCREDIBLE OFFER for MEMBERS ONLY!!!
Are you too busy to check for new posts or read all those lengthy yet insightful comments from me?
If you answered, “Hell yeah!”, than SB Select is right for you!
SB Select is a brand new service which will change the way you think about blogs. Instead of waiting in traffic or on a crowded subway car to check out my latest activities on this wonderful website, just sit back and relax. With SB Select you no longer have to wait to get caught up on my life’s news. Just sign up for a free 1 month trial of SB Select and you’ll receive PERSONALIZED comments from yours truly. THAT’S RIGHT! I will contact you at the number you specify and leave my comments with you a full 24 HOURS before I post them on the website! YOU HEARD ME CORRECTLY! 24 HOURS!!! Talk about a jump-start!
With SB Select you can experience the unthinkable. No more cRaZy acronyms like, LOL or LMAO! I’ll crack up right into your freaking phone! You won’t have to worry about emoticons either! With SB Select’s intuitive, patented TeleSense(R) Technology you will actually be able to SENSE 
and 
by the pattern of my voice!
That’s not all!!! Sign up now and I’ll also ramble on about whatever pops into my head including humorous anecdotes, inside jokes, strange rhetoric, what I did last night, how I’m doing and more!
If you ACT NOW I will also give you a taste of the future called, “SB Select PLUS”! SB Select PLUS is a premium service which allows you to receive ALL POSTS AND COMMENTS via phone and even lets you call in your comments for dictation! You read it correctly! With SB Select PLUS you’ll never have to visit the site again!
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3 Responses to SB Select
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Dude, I think I need to go home now and change my shorts from pissing my pants laughing.
Although you sould have really registered that 800 #… AT&T currently ownz it!!
And I must say, I have contacted you by phone several times with no answer and surprisingly enough there is no, “Please look for me on Snowbrain” on your voicemail, you silly salami!!
Bravo! your using a blinker.
I have been waiting for this to release for a long time. Consider me signed up.
I think I’m going to spring for the SB Select PLUS!
I can’t wait to start using this service. Sounds like this is going to change my life!
Thanks Phil.
*Calls 1-800-SBSELECT and Purchases SB Select PLUS*
Definitely has my vote for Best Monday Post Of All Time. Masterful usage of blink tag technology!